A 3-D Approach to Decision Making: Handling Competing Values

The November/December issue of Rev! magazine has a great article by Kevin G. Ford on decision making that I'd like to link to here, but so far, I've only found it in the hard copy. It's adapted form Ford's book, Transforming Church. Any way, it's the perfect article for the holidays, as I know many families (ours too) must make decisions about where to travel, how much to spend, and which traditions to continue. When everyone has a different (and competing) idea about what to do, how do you decide?

1. Dialogue: Allow everyone to have a chance to simply state personal opinions without feedback or interruption from others. Everyone must share an opinion...no interruptions, feedback, or reactions. Then, stop! By beginning in this format, the underlying "metamessages," pre-conceived notions, misunderstood ideas, etc. are revealed.
2. Discuss: Set a time for discussion for few days after the dialogue time. This allows everyone to process what was said and internalize others' ideas. During the discussion time, identify competing values so that they can all be considered when it comes time to make the final decision. As Ford writes, consensus is not the goal--

"Consensus is rarely achieved up front. Rather consensus is the by-product of good decisions."

3. Decide: Here is where a leader will decide what is best for all involved, based on what has come to light through the first two sessions. Don't be suprised if conflict emerges at this point-- it's just the nature of trying to work out competing values. However, by this point, the group will be dealing with clear cut conflicts that matter. All of the unspoken problems have been voiced earlier.

Ford's 3-D approach can apply to families, churches, businesses, and more. As he writes,

"Instead of the leader 'fixing' the problem, the people [are] called to engage in the adaptive process."

Everyone can go along with an idea when they share in its creation.

"Christian" is a Noun

Well, tomorrow is Thanksgiving, so I'm finishing up some stuff today and heading down to Greenville, SC to visit my family for a couple of days. Last night, David and I led worship at Tirzah ARP near Newport for their Thanksgiving thing. We had a good time, and it was nice to visit with another body of believers and hear some of their stories. Tirzah has been around something like 200 years, and I appreciated their quest to remain true to who they've been while embracing newer forms of communication/worship. Andy Putnam (their pastor) is another Mac aficionado, and I enjoyed seeing his set-up.

Any way, this morning I was reading an interview with Rob Bell of Mars Hill Church in Michigan. He's an interesting guy who has drawn his fair share of praise and criticism from other Christian leaders, but he said something that I've felt for a long time-- just much more eloquently than I:

"I don't believe in Christian art or music. The word Christian was originally a noun. A person, not an adjective. I believe in great art. If you are an artist, your job is to do great art and you don't need to tack on the word Christian. It's already great. God is the God of Creativity. Categories desecrate the art form. It's either great art or it isn't. Followers of Jesus should have the first word instead of coming late to the game with some poor quality spin-off. Let's talk about things before everyone else."

Everything about the Pastor's call mixes art and science (creativity and concreteness): public speaking, counseling, writing, music, events, etc. It's a very fulfilling role to have in a community, but we fall short so many times. We play catch-up to real artists because we're not willing to push out of our comfort zone and inspire creativity in our congregations.

An artistic community is built on trust, but I wonder, do we always have that trust in the Church? The artist must have the trust of those around him/her in order to take risks. Risks by their very nature can lead to success or failure, but we must take them.

How can we support leaders (volunteer or otherwise) in our ministry and let them know that when they take risks, we are there for them to celebrate success as well as overcome failure?

"Unless the Lord Builds a House..."

My wife and I were talking yesterday about how much we're looking forward to Thanksgiving. It's that time of year where busyness sets in and the day-to-day work schedule begins to feel like it will never let up. I'm sure you notice it, too once the cold weather sets in. You don't necessarily feel it in your body (stress is physical), but you sense it in your soul (burn out is emotional). We add a lot of activities to our plates this year in addition to our regular work load. Family needs become more significant, too. I found this verse to today in Psalm 127: 1-2. It spoke directly to my heart during this busy work season.

1 Unless the Lord builds a house,
the work of the builders is wasted.
Unless the Lord protects a city,
guarding it with sentries will do no good.
2 It is useless for you to work so hard
from early morning until late at night,
anxiously working for food to eat;
for God gives rest to his loved ones.

At LWC, we're beginning a new sermon series that should tie in well with the extra challenges we face during the holiday season. It's called Learning to Live in Harmony. We'll be studying the book of Matthew and getting some inspiration from a fantastic book: The Peacemaker by Ken Sande. It should be a very practical series on resolving conflict and restoring balance to your home.

Enter

It's been 2 weeks now since we studied Psalm 100 as part of our LWC Band practice. I arrived at LWC in 2002, and a study of the Psalms was an important part of what I wanted to do each week with our artists. I honestly expected to be done by now (there are only 150 psalms), but you know how it goes...

Any way, Psalm 100 is familiar to a lot of folks because it is the source of "He Has Made Me Glad," a hymn I remember from my upbringing in the Southern Baptist Church. When we sang it, it was fast, clappy, and had a touch of saloon-style piano playing. Honestly, I've never thought much of it.

When we looked afresh at God's word the other night, though, the first word of verse 4 jumped out at me:
"Enter his gates with thanksgiving
and his courts with praise;
give thanks to him and praise his name.

For the LORD is good and his love endures forever;
his faithfulness continues through all generations."

That one word, "Enter," says so much. Or maybe it doesn't say so much. Here's what I mean. It doesn't say:
-Wait around at his gates until you feel thankful.
-Walk through his gates and see if he makes you want to praise him.
-Ignore his gates...they won't do you any good any way.

The message here is this: We enter the gates of God's presence thankful for what he is doing; anticipating what he will do. His love "endures forever"( v. 5) There are too many Sundays where I myself enter his gates with a bad attitude, thinking "I hope God shows up today."

In reality, He's always there. God's presence if always good. He's always worthy of thanks and praise. Sadly, we're not always ready for him.

Now, each Sunday when I walk through the thick metal doors of our meeting place at Bethel Elementary School, I'm reminded to enter, not wondering what God is going to do, but looking forward to being a part of what he is already doing.

photo by Declan McCullagh

God...Help Wanted

I don't know about you, but I often catch myself doing things on my own. Recently, after a particularly frustrating Sunday morning (low attendance, low energy, sound problems, set-up problems, bad cell phone reception, and no milk for my cereal) I found myself asking, "What am I doing wrong?"

And it hit me, "That is what I'm doing wrong. I'm doing it all myself."

It's pretty sad when you're a pastor and you find yourself not relying on God. We can only lead people where we ourselves have gone. After some time of confession and stepping back to catch my breath, I talked to my wife. We realized we both had been struggling with our spiritual energy.

I'm reminded of God's promise to us in 2 Corinthians 12:9 " “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” When I'm weak, I'm tempted to fix myself. In reality, God is already at work.

Here's a couple of books my wife and I have found helpful in keeping our spiritual momentum maintained:
-The Power of a Praying Husband
-The Power of a Praying Wife

The Gift of Worship

In this month's issue of Collide Magazine (www.collidemagazine.com) Gary Molander of Floodgate Productions writes, "In our day, 'great worship' has become something that moves my heart, not something that moves his."

It's a concept as old as "Church" itself, and yet we still face this on a daily basis (or weekly basis, in terms of Sunday worship): Why do we go to worship?

The opening question of the Westminster Shorter Catechism asks this:
Q: "What is the chief end of man?"
A: "Man's chief end is to glorify God and to enjoy him forever."
This should inform our Heart of Worship as well.

My favorite portion of the article was Molander's comparison of corporate worship to being the guest at a birthday party:
"In corporate worship...competing desires show up with power and passion-- the simultaneous desires to outwardly give something, and to inwardly receieve. We bring gifts to give the celebrated birthday Boy (worship), and we end up wanting to keep these gifts for ourselves.

Your Heart of Worship

Here at LWC, David (our Lead Pastor) and I meet every Tuesday to plan our Sunday worship time. If everything is running smoothly, we plan 2 weeks in advance.

One thing that is important to us (though hard sometimes) is going over the good, bad, and ugly of the previous worship time. Sometimes, we have problems out of our control; other times we have problems because we had too much control.

My main contribution to Sunday morning comes down to music and media. David and I work to create a good atmosphere so folks can encounter God's presence.

I've been looking for some kind of evaluation tool that we could use to "rate" how well our music, media, etc. has gone. These so called "Worship Evaluations" aren't too hard to find. Rick Warren at Saddleback has a good one (http://www.pastors.com/RWMT/article.asp?ArtID=7193). Calvin College has one, too (http://www.calvin.edu/worship/planning/insights/12.php).

This one stood out from the pack, though. It was in the Sept/Oct issue of "Rev!" magazine (yes, even Reverends have their own mag). I found it again online at the Corinth UMC blog. (http://www.corinthmethodist.com/PastorsPage.dsp) It's an evaluation not of "worship," but the "worshipper." It got me wondering how I would measure up on an average Sunday:

Rank “1” as low and “5” as high. IMAGINE THIS IS GOD SPEAKING TO YOU!
___You prepared yourself for worship long before you arrived at church.
___You arrived on time for your appointment with me.
___You expressed your adoration of me with enthusiastic singing.
___You confessed your sin to me with complete honesty.
___You gave joyfully and sacrificially to the work of advancing my kingdom.
___You heard the announcements as invitations for your growth and my service.
___You humbled yourself in reverence at the reading of my Word.
___You recognized the unique Word that I prepared for you in today’s sermon.
___You gave thanks for the ways you saw me at work during the past week.
___You shared your needs in faith that I hear and can handle them.
___You opened your heart to my closing benediction.
(Adapted from Rev! Magazine Sept./Oct. 2007

Halo 3 and our Church

I recently read the September 15th issue of WIRED magazine. The cover story on "Halo 3" caught my eye. In it, we learn of the science behind the art of creating the latest installment in this popular franchise.

I was struck with one particular aspect of the article:
"Pagulayan makes a note... It is his job to find flaws in Halo 3 that its creators, who know what players SHOULD do, might not be able to see. He assesses whether the aliens have gotten too lethal, whether the revamped Needler guns are powerful enough, and — most important — if and when players are getting bored or (as is more often the case) frustrated..."

The article goes on to say how the developers have spent a great time studying problem areas in the game...where players are getting stuck, lost or killed again and again. They then correct these problem areas to bring gameplay back into balance. Note that the game designers don't say "too bad," or "this game rocks and you're just not good enough."

Now, what does this have to do with our church? I catch myself (and I know many others are tempted as well) creating a ministry opportunity that I think is great, perfect, progressive, deep, etc... and then folks don't like it. They don't show up, they burn out, or they miss the point. My knee-jerk reaction is to get mad or frustrated and think everyone else is wrong. They're the ones with the problem, right?

Not so, according to Halo 3. Leading a ministry where it needs to go requires a delicate balancing act between doing the will of God and remaining open to the feedback or criticism of participants. It means being willing to go back and re-plan or re-group. It means forgetting what (in gamer speak) "players SHOULD do," and realizing what they ARE doing, making small corrections to take the gamer through to the next level.

http://www.wired.com/gaming/virtualworlds/magazine/15-09/ff_halo